Hi! Welcome to my little corner of the internet where I hope to share tips and tricks on all things anxiety, relationships, and wellness.
FULL DISCLOSURE: I have written and rewritten this post about a thousand times. Ok maybe not that many but I have definitely hit the delete button over and over and even got as far as sending a draft to my nearest and dearest for critique. Even after positive reviews I still felt cautious about posting anything because of this big scary idea of being vulnerable and really putting myself out there. The fear of judgment was running deep and strong and that tiny voice in my head just kept telling me not to do it.
In grad school I had a teacher who taught us to “feel the fear and do it anyway.” So here I am, feeling the fear but doing it anyway. It’s a phrase that I think about often, especially when I know there is something scary that I should push myself to do but I know deep down that I probably won’t do for whatever reason. I’m not talking skydiving, bungee jumping, jump off a cliff scary (am I discovering my fear of heights as I write this??) but I mean the really good scary stuff, the stuff that pushes you out of your comfort zone towards growth. I’ve experienced that fear many times in my life and have always come out on the other side of that fear feeling immense growth and pride for taking that scary leap.
In my work I often say to my clients that I wouldn’t ask them to do something that I wouldn’t do myself. Often what I am asking of them in our sessions is to be vulnerable, dig deep, and go out on a limb and examine the really scary stuff that they’ve ignored for years. I ask them to take chances and try new things and I ask them to bring their authentic selves to the work we do. If I am asking that of others it seems only fitting that I should do that myself. So here I am!
Is there something you feel afraid of but know you should do anyway?
Here are some questions to ask yourself when you notice you are holding yourself back:
What am I afraid of?
Is my fear warranted and where is this fear coming from?
What is the worst thing that could happen?